Reinhart’s Red Apple Cider



It’s Christmas in a goddamn can!  “Take a drink from Santa’s dick!” or what I used to call summers with uncle Dale before he went to jail.  I think this is the first light cider I’ve reviewed and it doesn’t disappoint.  Yes I know purists will tell you a cider traditionally had a high alcohol content because “reasons” but fuck them.  This would be a great party cider where you want to socialize with friends and have more than a few but don’t want to be on the floor.


This can makes me think of Christmas.  Something about the red and gold.  If anything I don’t think the wisest choice because someone like me who’s very peculiar around their selections of food and drink are gonna see this on the shelf mid-July and think “This must be old stock cause it’s Christmas themed.” just like you don’t want that old can of Coke with Santa on it that your friend has had in the fridge for the last 6 months.  Ya it’s in a can but c’mon now.


Apple Cider, Sulphites


I like the fizz on this.  The bubbles don’t come out like crazy but it’s another example of how they stick to the glass like a ginger ale.  I don’t know what does that but what the fuck it’s pretty.


Smells like teen spir – I mean apples.  I think I’m fighting some sinus thing.  Maybe I shouldn’t be drinking.  Maybe I should.  Maybe go fuck yourself.  I like the smell it’s very subtle and soft.  Like the cider it smells light.


Light again.  I actually quite enjoy how, due to the low alcohol content, it’s almost more like a carbonated apple juice.  You can taste the hard aspect of it but at the same time it goes down smooth and sweet.  Sometimes you don’t need a metric fuck-tonne of alcohol to make your drink sing.  Sometimes you just need a well made cider.  You can actually tell that from the ingredients.  This very much feels like they made a nice traditional non-alcoholic cider and then managed to convert it to a hard cider.