KW Craft Cider



Like an ice cold cider if you remove the hate.

This shit is good yo. I can’t say I’d be drinking it every day or in excess but it’s damn enjoyable. Probably better to have on a Sunday afternoon on a deck than it is 10:56 PM on a Saturday evening during a goddamn pandemic.


I don’t like how WordPress done fucked with how layouts are done on blog posts. I don’t have an inkling to understand if I can fix it and shit. Fuck that. So anyways, about this cider. I feel like it’s the mid-90’s. Michael Jackson is still with us and he’s about to unleash Black & White on prime time TV.

Trust me you’re hearing the “Yeah Yeah Yeah” aren’t you?

This shit was revolutionary when it came out. What the fuck happened with society? Fuck there’s a whole different diatribe that can be done as someone on the tail end of Gen-X and as we keep getting older we continue to be in this fucked up middle child syndrome of the world where we’re either forgotten or shit on.

What I will not do is forget or shit on this design. I like this can. Heh. Cans. I’m watching a CBC documentary on escorts right now and this woman has nice cans but it’s British and as soon as she talks goddamn the British accent has been romanticised so much but when you hear it from regional areas it’s like hearing a goddamn hick from Alabama. “How ya doin’ guvna?”

For women maybe. Sure as shit not for me.

So this shit is tight. Simple. Good contrast. I love how it looks. You see it on the shelf and it stands out. Plus I’m secretly a huge fan of flat blat. I mean flat as in gloss level not Jada Pinkett-Smith you mean fucker.

So when you roll this bitch over the back is equally nice. I like a little something to read and it’s a good simple story however it makes me question what the fuck champagne yeast is. I mean, ya I get it. It’s the yeast used to make champagne smartass but as I asked my dad, technically does the yeast have to come from the Champagne region of France otherwise they have to call that shit “Sparkling Wine” yeast because the French are notoriously pretentious and pedantic wankers?


Freshly Pressed Ontario Apples, Champagne Yeast, Cane Sugar, Sulphites

This shit be Gluten Free & Vegan yo! Does anyone want to tell them the debate around yeast? Doesn’t matter though because humans are notoriously great about stuffing their heads in the sand when something conflicts with their natural bias.



The OG Sci-Fi pimp. This movie would have been so much better if he had a cane and a strong backhand.

This has a pale lustre with a small bubble that dissipated pretty fast. You’ll notice the change in glass and I’m adding ice. Yeah fuck you I’m turning into a prude.


… and that ain’t a bad thing.

I figure I have more than a few reviews to do before the corona gets me and I lose all sense of taste and smell. Saying that, maybe I got it already because I ain’t smelling shit. That’s not necessarily a bad thing but it’s weird it’s like there’s nothing. I put it to my nose. Nothing. I take a sip. I can taste the smell when I sip it but there’s literally nothing hitting my nose.


This shit is good. I will be speaking out my ass but I almost would say I can tell that it’s champagne yeast. There’s awesome hints of the same tones you’d get from a wine. It makes me wonder a couple of things.

1. If I drink this shit with strawberries in it like some socialite on her 3rd glass at a posh downtown bar at 2pm on a Wednesday afternoon will it still be good?
2. Will it give you a bitching headache/hangover like champagne if you get blotto on it?

I think this it’s refreshing and he has that dryness that you say is in other ciders but here you can legit feel the dryness.

You like dry