West Avenue Pink Lemonade

Overall

7/10

I really like this but at the same time I feel it’s going to be really situtational.  There will be opportunities over the summer where I’m going to love having a glass of this but I need to make those moments count because this fucker is going to lose it’s fizz the longer I let it sit in my fridge so bottoms up you glorious growler.

If you want something that screams summer and you’re in Southwestern Ontario you need to buy and try it.  Jesus Christ is it ever tart though.  I hope you like tart.

Packaging

Direct from the cidererery I have what is referred to as a growler from West Avenue in Flamborough.  Why they are called growlers is beyond me it seems kind of aggressive for what amounts to a drink.  I need to look that up.  Anyways it’s hot as Satan’s asshole out here and this bottle looks like my balls right now except less refreshing.  I like West Avenue and this isn’t my first growler from them but this is the first review I’m doing from their ciders and the penultimate Heritage Dry will come when I manage to get it cold enough to be tolerable.  This bottle feels like if I were a milkman and I wanted to deliver cider or beer instead this is what I would do it in and I’d happily go door to door admiring the sex starved housewives as I drop off their cider for the day.  “Ma’am you know you don’t have a housecoat on right?  No I won’t fix your sink.  Yes I understand ‘Fix my plumbing’ is a euphamism for sex.”

Why is it called West Avenue anyways?  I like the apple tree morphing into buildings it’s a little homage to being southwestern Ontario where it’s exceedingly impossible to find yourself away from the concrete jungle.  Everything is pleasantly simple here and I hope they keep it this way.

As an aside, they’re clearly racist because here you have a brown bottle but what’s on top?  The white cap.  Keeping the man down as always.  I’m watching you big cider.

Ingredients

Who the fuck knows because I’m not there anymore and despite it being called pink lemonade I can assure you there is no pink and I don’t believe there were lemons in this either.  For that matter what is a pink lemon?  I imagine it’s grown by gay people whatever it is.  Which draws me to a tangent of things I really hate.  I really hate lemon stealing whores.

Appearance

I really like the hue on this and it’s definitely the most red out of any cider I’ve had.  Sure as shit isn’t pink I tell you what.  There was a minimal fizz as it came out.  I have to add that this came directly from the tap there is no bottle containing this bad boy.  It’s free as you would expect from sexually liberated pink lemonade.  I ain’t got no time for your 1950’s homogenized lemonade with it’s white picket fences and two kids.  We out here fam.

There’s a nice sustained bubble coming from the bottom of the glass.  Speaking of which I clearly prepared for this bringing my glass on a 1 hr drive out to The Hammer.  I should have brought some parquet with me as well.  I didn’t.  Tough shit.

Aroma

I’m actually not smelling much in the way of lemonade or pink lemonade and I may be jaded because I’m a dude that loves my pink lemonade.  Pink Lemonade > Lemonade.  Those are simply the facts and you have to deal with it.

What I will say is it’s got a damn nice smell and I’d stretch as far to say that it’s very appropriate to the time of year.  This is a early to mid-summer smell in an alcoholic drink.  I can’t say I’m going to want to get blasted on this but I’d definitely enjoy a glass or two of this on a nice summer day like today.  This may make no sense but in a way I swear to God I do smell hints of rhubarb and it’s only because I have rhubarb on the brain.  I am a fan of all fruits (hahahaha fruits) and vegetables which have length to them.  It has both a sweetness and a tartness there which rhubarb is famous for and that’s why we all love rhubarb.  Rhubarb is like that cousin of celery that everyone loves meanwhile celery is like this weird shit vegetable that can be good sometimes but more often than not needs to be with something.  I mean so does rhubarb so who knows what I’m saying.  Is celery salt made from celery?

How can mirrors be real if our eyes aren’t real?

Flavour

Oooh that’s tart.  Almost like a jolly rancher.  Imma do you a favour… Try not to google too much into Jolly Ranchers it can go really bad really quick if you’re not safe.  It does have that jolly rancher taste though.  So in a way you can argue this cider is made for children of the 90’s because aside from the 90’s who and when were people even sucking on jolly ranchers?  Speaking of sucking there’s much better things for that.  I digress.  The tartness in the taste is really accentuated by the tartness in the smell.  It’s a well thought out cider and the flavour really knocks it out.  The flavour, as great as it is, is definitely left in small doses.

Again.  Jesus Christ almighty this cider is tart.